Come to the Table Already

Recently, I was on a negotiation team for a merger. In the discovery documents, I uncovered some undisclosed financial information. It was enough to threaten the deal. Outside of the irony of me catching this (not a finance guru, friends), there was the issue of potential mistrust along with the less attractive new value proposition this new relationship now had. The C suite team was really struggling with this and in quite frankly I needed some prayer and reinforcement myself on this one, so I called some in.

My sister-in-law is a genius is this arena, being a, exceptional leader in finance and in what is good about PEI for business. I asked her opinion from a hypothetical position, and what she said I'll never forget. "Candice, it is always worth it to fight for the merger. The combined efforts and assets multiply growth."

That statement hit. It hit not just on that deal, but everywhere I look I continue to see God show me the deficits of division. Whether it's the two churches who could combine and serve more and learn from each other (yes, I actually watched this happen in real time in my 30s) or the two people in the same office duking it out for control, we have something about wanting the whole thing to ourselves, in our protective control, for our own glory.

I've had a good six months being recalled to Nehemiah again and again. I just keep finding nuggets of why we should fight for the merger versus walk away, and here is my take for all of us, as leaders:

1) The work shrinks. A rebuild was seemingly insurmountable. Nehemiah leveraged everything that was already there. Everyone in the build had a day jobs, other things to do- things they were uniquely skilled to do. They also unified under wanting protection, safety and restoration. The whole thing, having sat derelict for years, was complete in 52 DAYS. You read that right. 52 stinking days. Gates, walls, watchtowers, 52 days. Everyone focused on functioning within their one agreement, handling their one role, and the magnitude shrunk.

2) Spoiler alert- We're all good a few things, by design. Jesus was God and man and picked up 12 nobodies to go on a mission with him. Those gentlemen were all over the map in skillset and background. Paul never did it alone and made it a point to call out all the people who were in it with him every step of the way. Moses refused to do it alone. Why do we build walls around visions, call them ours and miss the opportunity of rigorous development? Instead of worrying about losing credit or control, consider the loss of a critical piece to the problem solving puzzle. Better yet, consider the possibilities of the best outcomes through leveraged assets.

3) Division is not from Design. Structures and organization strategies are like roadmaps. Those neat and orderly highways that allow people to run quickly toward a goal can always cross the line into silos, gates and walls, however. Look at everything you are working on and living out in the same way Genesis is presented to us: each thing and each being was part of a larger, integrated system. Later we see this presented to us as the body of Christ which is also mapped out by the human body and the layout of the temple. All of those things on all different scales are pointing us back to the fact that we each have a part to play and they are all required and needed in the proper role to ensure things function well.

Our decision that something not like us is not valuable to us is short-sighted, but also common. There are endless reasons to not take a step, but everywhere I look, I see some of the divisionist structures being tried, tested for sturdiness, questioned for efficacy.

A few years ago, I was asked to be on a call about faith led business content. I was one of just a couple of vocational ministry leaders who was using the content inside a church anywhere in the US. They wanted to know feedback because they were massive with actual business leaders, but they could not get churches to engage with it. The business leaders were growing in their faith and wanting to connect with their church communities but could not seem make anything stick.

We began to brainstorm, in the discussion we talked about how pastors also stood to gain from leadership and business acumen gained from these relationships that would steward church teams and finances in better ways. Likewise, business leaders stood to learn prayer strategy for their org, how to care for teams and stakeholders and so many other things. I asked about a conference to bring these leaders to the table from both sides with breakouts and panels for either side to learn. The response stopped me dead in my tracks.

"We tried that one. We could not get anyone to agree on how to approach it or who would lead it." And there it was. Whether it's someone new on the team or the fear of another group's lack or differing expertise, we cannot get out of the way to allow each other in- to share our gifts and talents with each other to the benefit of the greater whole. Instead of considering every liability of conflicting thought, lack of knowledge of the other party, control, could we consider for one moment what something like that could stand to gain?

The intriguing trend I'm witnessing in my work seems like a response against all this separatist thinking. Innovative methods (or perhaps the resurgence of traditional ones) that promote more unified thinking are rapidly spreading across various fields—from functional medicine in healthcare to the influence of spirituality on mental health, from community involvement in business to churches actively increasing their communal contributions.

So whatever your mountain of influence, method of thought, or type of expertise or personality, explore the possibility of coming down from it sometimes, meeting someone across the valley from you and creating change from the exchange of ideas. You need someone else's iron to sharpen your own, and God designed it all to work best when we integrated each of our pieces to the puzzle.

The step required for greater impact and the invitation remains- to come have a seat.